GGC Rapz Presents: OPP

Apologies for ditching my "MCdom" for a few months but Yo GGC Rapz are back! (And a little angrier than usual.)

Here's a little rap for all my playground haters. Because unless it's just me, 93% of parents I meet are wack-jobs. (Word?)

For those of you sick & tired of the haters in the 'hood... This one's for you...



Othere People's Parents
(Who's Down with OPP? Hell no. Not me.)
Original O.P.P. By: Naughty By Nature

Army with harmony
GGC drop a load on 'em


OPP how can I explain them
I'll take you frame by frame then
To have y'all jumpin' shall we singin' it
O is for Other P is for People scratchin' temple
The last P...well...that's not that simple
Another way to call compet-i-moms on all their bullshit
Seven little letters equal one big 'ol conniption fit...

(Hit me with it, parents.)
(Yeah, yeah...)
(Let's put the parent in parenthesis.)
(Say, Word.)

..You ever had a Mom and met her on a nice hello
You get her name and number and then right before you have to go
She gets all crazy-bitch-ass and decides to call your shit
Because her kid has better manners and knows better than to hit.
Yo, why you gotta go there? Who said you knew what was best?
Just because you have your kid on every preschool waiting list?
Just because your kid is five years old, still drinkin' from your breast?

It's OPP, who think it's their place to defeat.
There's no room for relationship there's just room to compete!
How many parents out there know just what I'm gettin' at?
Who thinks it's wrong 'cos I'm splittin' and co-hittin' at?
Well if you do, that's OPP and you're not down with it.
But if you don't, here's your membership...


Chorus:
You down with OPP (Oh no,not me) 3X
Who's down with OPP (Not usually!)
You down with OPP (Pulease, spare me!) 3X
Who's down with GGC (All the homies!)


As for all the Diaper Dudes, OPP means something different
The first two letters are the same but the last is something
different.
The hypocrisy of parents who rebel against the mod
Then decorate the family van with flames like some hot rod

Have you ever known a Daddy who talks shit about your life?
Who has the nerve to say, "You should be more like my wife."
Who glares at your kid's paci and makes a snide remark like so:
"Binkies aren't for little boys and you need to tell him, no!"
Or who just because he's older thinks he has the nerve to say
"When I was your age" (dot dot dot)"Well, you see, back in MY day..."
And "My pediatrician this" and "My pediatrician that."
And "90 percentile for weight means your child is getting fat."
How much you wanna bet that he's the one with issues
His baby boy's on Zoloft and his daughter's eating tissues.

Who really cares if you're "Queen Bee" of your Mommy and me group?
PTA President and Soccer Coach and lead the Girlscout Troup
You'll talk shit when I turn my back and think you have me duped.
You're poodle perm and overalls (no offense) are so not cute.
You rock your Baby on Board sticker and think you rule the ring
You flaunt your Zales #1 Mom Pendent like its pure suburban bling.

This new mom tried to OPP me with her internet IQ
With her Child Magazine Q&A and "What kind of mom are you?"
She read it in a magazine that "stay at home is so much better."
And then she saw it on Dr. Phil that working Moms bring home more cheddar.
She said she was confused, but it was pretty clear to me
That she was just another lemming 'bout to fall into the sea.
I said, "Yo I gotta go. I don't like you. You're a jerk."
"If you want to "Mommy War" with me, I stay at home AND work."
The bitch was so confused she nearly fell back on her fanny.
And saved was she, by the grace of God (or in other words, her nanny.)

Chorus:
You down with OPP (Say no, oh please!) 3X
Who's down with OPP (Not you! Not me!)
You down with OPP (But seriously?) 3X
Who's down with...

GGC


Related: More Yo GGC Rapz:

(Word to the Mothaz and the Baby's Daddies.)

28 comments:

Unknown | 11:42 AM

God. I love it. You are always SO on point! I was ready to rumble with a Yuppie-Mom at the playground this weekend. Thanks - that was so great.

Anonymous | 12:02 PM

Dwight can only stand in respectful silence and salute pure, creative genius.

Anonymous | 12:09 PM

Okay, so at BlogHer next year, we're gonna rent a karaoke machine and perform all the Yo GGC Rapz in the courtyard of the hotel. And somebody had better be prepared to videotape us.

Who's with me?!

GIRL'S GONE CHILD | 12:23 PM

I'm with you! That sounds like fun! Word!

toyfoto | 1:00 PM

I don't even know how to praise this. Really. It's too good for words. Uber talent that's what you've got.

Oh man, and rappin' at Blogher would be soooooo far hip that the LIGHT from hip would take ten million years to get to where I'm standing now.

Anonymous | 1:38 PM

That was AWESOME! You rock.

Anonymous | 1:53 PM

I'll bring the video camea. GGC this rap made me pull a garth, I am simply just not worthy. Thanks

Anonymous | 1:56 PM

if you recall i am the one who used to have a racial identity disorder: i sooo really appreciated that rap!! in other words- that was phat yo, off the heezy fo' sheezy!
my oldest is a little older(12)and she is everything a 12 year old girl should be(bitchy)but the other moms in the school yard(and on their holier than thou blogs) act like theirs are perfect. no crying, no attitudes, no waiting for their period to start bitchiness. if you ask me, it's their honor roll, smiling all the time, little Mary sunshines who are not normal. Down with OPP? Hell no, not me!

Anonymous | 1:57 PM

damn it! i did it again!
~jjlibra

Mom101 | 3:12 PM

I've said it before and I'll say it again - you are BRILLIANT! You need to put these altogether in a book. I'm serious.

"eating tissues?" absolutely freakin' hilarious!

Anonymous | 3:23 PM

Rebecca,
your posts make my day
in every single way
to hell with them alls
they can *$$# my balls
Pascale

ok,so i don't have any real balls (figurative ones, yes) but i needed a rhyming word and i'm not nearly as gifted as you are my dear, you totally ROCK!
love ya chicka

Karen Bodkin | 5:41 PM

(Let's put the parent in parenthesis.)

Severe snortin' up in here.

Anonymous | 6:32 PM

seriously. you outdo yourself every month.

Chris | 7:39 PM

Brilliant! Best one yet! Damn, I've missed your raps.

Maria | 8:08 PM

Word!

Anonymous | 8:27 PM

becca you are my hero.

Cristina | 11:58 PM

GGC, you are both a literary and musical genius. *bowing down to you, girl*

PunditMom | 6:38 AM

GCC, I can only aspire to be as cool & creative as you! Archer is a lucky dude to have a mom with such a wicked sense of humor!

Word!

Jonathon Morgan | 7:50 AM

I miss that song.

Word.

Kristin | 8:13 AM

Fabulous!

Anonymous | 8:29 AM

There's nothing like a classic...

Word...

Kristen | 9:02 AM

Man, you are amazing. That rocked.

Crunchy Carpets | 11:22 AM

LMAO!!!

WORD!


I am going to be singing
Momma Needs a Girls Night Out ALL DAY LONG

Anonymous | 5:56 PM

I'm printing this and framing it.

I'm not kidding.

Have I told you lately that I love you?

Anonymous | 5:56 PM

Loved it, loved it, loved it... You are too funny!

Anonymous | 6:30 PM

Laughing my ass off here - thanks!

Anonymous | 9:54 AM

absolute. fucking. genius.

Anonymous | 10:35 AM

This new mom tried to OPP me with her internet IQ
With her Child Magazine Q&A and "What kind of mom are you?"
She read it in a magazine that "stay at home is so much better."
And then she saw it on Dr. Phil that working Moms bring home more cheddar.
She said she was confused, but it was pretty clear to me
That she was just another lemming 'bout to fall into the sea.
I said, "Yo I gotta go. I don't like you. You're a jerk."
"If you want to "Mommy War" with me, I stay at home AND work."
The bitch was so confused she nearly fell back on her fanny.
And saved was she, by the grace of God (or in other words, her nanny.)


sorry to hijack your comments, but i swear to all that is good and big and influential, the stanza above is pure perfection genius. i kept wanting to quote back single lines but then you broke my eyes with that last punch -- "in other words, her nanny." holy crap. holy crap. holy crap. thank you for this. you made my week. (and totally paid me back for the "i know martin kratt" gift i gave you a couple of weeks ago!)